Over the 29 years that I have been living with cancer, I have heard or read from a number of people the advice to not claim cancer by using the phrase, “my cancer.” They recommended keeping it distant by calling it “the cancer” – not mine. As if denying it or resisting it would make it less powerful. But I’ve also heard “what we resist persists.” When we resist something, we tend to give it more energy.

I have found it more empowering to “own” or “claim” my cancer. It is part of my body. It isn’t separate from me. There’s a reason some of the cells in my body started growing out of control. I feel that if I own it and accept it, I can more easily take responsibility for some of my behaviors that have created a terrain in my body that permitted cancer to grow. If I own it and understand what is allowing it to grow, I may have more power to control or manage it.

The language that we often use about cancer is the language of war. We ‘fight’ cancer, as if it is something attacking us from the outside. The language of fighting doesn’t resonate with me. When we are preparing to engage in a fight, our bodies tense up and the sympathetic nervous system takes over. The sympathetic nervous system’s primary process is to stimulate the body’s fight-or-flight response. This leads to a lowered immune system. And a lowered immune system is the last thing I need when I’m dealing with cancer.

What I know for sure is that healing happens when the parasympathetic system is active in our bodies. That is when “rest and repair” happens. That’s when the immune system is the strongest. I can best stimulate this state of rest and repair by cultivating, practicing, and sustaining elevated emotions, such as gratitude, appreciation, inspiration, freedom, kindness, selflessness, compassion, love and joy. I have even heard people say they needed to not only quit fighting cancer, but learn to love their cancer. In some cases, it went away once they were able to love it.

What I also know for sure is that how we respond to having cancer is crucial, and is also very individual. What feels like a key approach for me, based on my beliefs and my history, may not be as effective for you. That’s why our September conference will focus on Stories of Healing, and will showcase dissimilar stories. We can learn so much by hearing from others how they responded to their cancer diagnosis, but we don’t have to try to copy any one of them. We listen to their stories and pay attention to what resonates with us. Our inner guidance will inform us what path is the best for each of us.

Registration is open for our one-day Cancer as a Turning Point, From Surviving to Thriving™ free conference, in Sacramento on September 8th. This conference, celebrating our 25th anniversary, is our last one. Healing Journeys will still offer some workshops in the future, but this is your last chance to attend a Cancer as a Turning Point™ free conference. Please help us spread the word and join us if you can.

Thank you to those who recently donated on the Big Day of Giving! And if you missed it, you can still contribute to make it possible to offer this valuable conference experience at no charge.

As always, I welcome your comments; to reply please click here.

In the Spirit of Healing,

Jan Adrian, MSW
Founder and Executive Director